Old Teeth Not Meant for Old Candy

My son got a bag of candy for his birthday and, of course, I've been sneaking into his room and grabbing a piece every once in a while (read: twice a day). It was fine when I could snack on a mini pack of M&Ms, but today, my only choice was Milk Duds, which should only be eaten when teeth are young and can handle the pain and suffering that goes along with gnawing said Duds. I tried to chomp with only my front teeth for fear of pulling out a filling, but the sticky suckers would manage to find their way to the back, where it takes floss, a toothpick and possibly a fork to work out all the remnants. Is this really worth it? Hell no. Ergo, I'm hightailing it to the corner store for something that won't give me lockjaw.